The Royal Robbery
The Queen and Di are out for a drive in one of the Queen's Range Rovers.
Suddenly some armed robbers leap out of the bushes and stop the car.
"Give us the money", they shout at the Queen.
"But I'm the Queen of England, I have no need for money."
"Oh, shit", says the leader of the armed band, and turns to Di. "Give us yer jewels."
"But I don't wear my jewels all the time, only on state occasions."
The armed robbers looked fed up, when suddenly they heard the sound of wailing sirens approaching.
"Quick, out of the car. We"ll have the Range Rover at least", and with that the robbers drove off.
As the Queen and Di are waiting for the police to get there, Di turns to the Queen.
"What did you do to all the cash you had? You're always loaded."
"Ah," says the Queen, "I saw the robbers and in the few seconds before they got to the car I rolled up my notes and tucked them into that little place that women have. "Reaching into her skirt, she produces several thousand pounds in notes.
"And what did you do with your jewels? You always wear lots of jewelery, my
dear." The Queen says to Di.
"Well, like you, in those few seconds before the robbers got to the car, I slipped off my rings, necklaces and tiara, and like you, slipped them into that little place that only women have." Reaching down she plucks out her jewelery.
They both sit quietly for a few minutes, before the Queen turns to Di...
"You know, if Fergie had been with us, we could still have that Range Rover."